Pistole calls TSA “gold standard” for aviation security

Baklavabyseelensturm

In what is surely the howler of the week, TSA Administrator John Pistole has declared the TSA “the gold standard of aviation security.”

It gets better:

“We know from intelligence that terrorists see the U.S. as the gold standard of aviation security, because of all the layers,” Pistole said.

Oh, yes, those layers! Gotta love the layers.

You don’t know about the layers, you say? Well, step right up. The TSA has a nifty diagram to show you all the way cool things they’re doing to Keep You Safe. And the colors are so pretty!

But funny, I don’t see confiscating cupcakes on the list. Or theft. Or sexual assault. Or harassing children in wheelchairs. Or harassing people who are ill, even dying. Or squeezing cancer survivors’ breast prostheses. Or dabbling in child porn. Or saving us from terroristy purses and terroristy watches and terroristy belt buckles and terroristy insulin pumps.

How come those things aren’t on the diagram of layers? Surely these actions have prevented disaster countless times.

The linked article where Pistole makes his usual blundering statements is also full of other misinformation: for instance, about Pre-Check, about Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, about the scanners. But then, we’re used to snow jobs from Pistole and the credulous American media.

(Photo: Baklava by seelensturm/Flickr Creative Commons)

  • Zoltar50

    Where is the evidence that TSA’s search procedures make us safer than the far less invasive or time consuming european or israeli procedures? My view is that the TSA wastes billions of dollars each year in direct screening costs as well as lost time by travelers.

  • RB

    Seems Pistole can’t tell pyrite from gold.

    • Daisiemae

      What else can we expect from this fool?

  • http://www.facebook.com/sommer.gentry Sommer Gentry

    The gold standard comment wasn’t even the most delusional thing that child molester John Pistole had to say!

    “If this was zero, where everyone hates TSA, and this is 100 percent, I
    think we’ve moved off zero and I think we are making progress,” said
    Pistole, holding his hands apart to show the distance. “It’s not a short
    term, not an overnight fix.”

    Hey Mr. Hands-down-our-pants, everyone still hates TSA. And it would indeed be an overnight fix if you wanted to change that fact: STOP SEXUALLY ABUSING INNOCENT PEOPLE. Get your filthy underlings out of our pants. Get your pervert hands off our sex organs. Stop rubbing and smacking minors in body parts their bathing suits cover. In fact, stop the warrantless searches of people whom you have no reason to suspect of plotting terrorism. Problem solved.

    See: http://www.securityinfowatch.com/news/10859946/tsa-head-pitching-smarter-kinder-airport-security

  • Susan Richart

    Ditto to what 1amWendy said.

  • Daisiemae

    The entire world is in serious trouble if these Bozos in Blue are the gold standard. The level of incompetence, stupidity, and criminality would be laughable if it weren’t so heinous and obscene.

    A three year old could outwit TSA and their much vaunted levels of security. I guess that’s why TSA spends so much time terrifying and intimidating three year olds.

    To say nothing of their baby bottles. Newark TSA shut down the checkpoint for 30 minutes because of terrorist baby bottles.

    Why can’t this gold standard security force end the terrorism being waged by three year olds and their exploding baby bottles? Isn’t $8 billion a year enough to end the baby bottle reign of terror?

  • TSAisTerrorism

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Baklava!

  • 1amWendy

    The man is totally delusional.