TSA on the lookout for Christopher Dorner

Friends, Americans, countrymen, never fear! Your crack security team is on the case.

The TSA has issued a special alert to its employees to be on the lookout for ex-cop Christopher Jordan Dorner, who’s the subject of a multi-state manhunt.

The Transportation Security Administration has also urged pilots and aircraft operators to be alert and watch for stolen planes or suspicious passengers.

Ah, suspicious passengers! How long before one of the blue-shirted wonders nabs someone who “looks like” Christopher Dorner? I wonder if he’ll look as “suspicious” as Kevin Christopher Brown? Or Geoffrey McGann? Or Frank Hannibal?

“It is believed that Dorner received flight training during his time in the U.S. Navy, but the extent of his potential flying skills is unknown,” a notification read.

“While there is no specific information at this time that Dorner is considering using general aviation, TSA requests that operators use an increased level of awareness concerning any suspicious activity during the coming days.”

But of course. That “increased level of awareness” will surely pay off, just as it did with the Keystone Cops. Given how many innocent people the LAPD has already shot in this manhunt, how long before one of the TSA’s finest spies a Dorner look-alike and calls the cops to get him shot as well?

Only time will tell.

  • Fisher1949

    TSA vs. Christopher Dorner? That’s laughable. They will be running for the exits and a change of underwear.

    TSA Agents Told to Save Themselves in Case Of Mass Shooting, Showing Uselessness Of Agency


  • NotaSheep

    Somehow I can see a TSA screener actually letting him go (but stopping to grope a two-year-old while her mom stands there).

  • Forgive me, but upon encountering the acronym “TSA” or hearing the phrase “airport security”–especially now, as I try to imagine these goons thinking they’re going to capture an extremely well-trained and well-armed fugitive like Dorner, a man who is as likely to show up at one of their stupid Security Theatre Mises-en-scène as he is to walk into an airport McDonalds wearing a tutu–this scene and music play in my head: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUOe_hLg7Bo

    • Daisiemae

      Wow! I didn’t know that TSA had their own TV show! Hilarious!

  • Susan Richart

    I fear for anyone who has even the slightest resemblance to him going through an airport.